Not long ago, Tom Simon was news director of a local talk radio station — hosting Sheriff Joe Arpaio on the air and bragging that he had Arpaio programmed on his cell phone. Now Simon is, once again, a guest of the sheriff. In late April, Simon was arrested by…
A pocket full of jimmie hats and no honey willing to help me put them to use, I was resigned to sitting home with Mr. Zig Zag, a fifth of Sky and that new Petey Pablo CD. But, suddenly, the land line was buzzing. “Wassup, Buddha-butt? Feelin’ sexy on this…
The True Boys of Summer Baseball thrives in the desert: What a wonderful story by Robert Nelson on Phoenix as the baseball mecca of the world (“Fields of Dreams,” May 13). I had no idea that all this was going on here. It was really eye-opening, and a wonderful story…
Dora Schriro lives in a parallel universe, a place where teenage thugs sit on Santa’s lap and Girl Scouts visit penitentiaries. In Schriro’s world, parolees are called “clients,” not criminals. It’s a land of jailhouse picnics, where inmates raise money for charity — when they’re not busy doing arts and…
All you P-town gangstas know of Mr. Kreme’s passion for fashion, my penchant for poppin’ collars with the flyest ladies in the 602 or the 480. So when I heard tell of this erotic fashion show called “Feel Me” goin’ down at Holga’s art colony downtown, I was all up…
Smart Mormon Misfits Looking out for No. 1: The column by John Dougherty on Governor Janet Napolitano (“Running Scared,” May 13) lightheartedly yet firmly touched on a few key issues I have been keeping up with since moving from Arizona to Colorado late last year, shortly after Napolitano was elected…
Arizona State University’s Student Health and Wellness Center is in turmoil, as officials await the results of a six-month independent investigation into allegations that the university’s head sports doctor has misdiagnosed student athletes. But parents are worried that the investigation will only uncover the beginning of what has gone wrong…
Carletta Tilousi got a phone call in March 2003 that would not only change her life, but that of every person in her tribe. She’s a member of the Havasupai, a small Indian nation in northern Arizona with about 650 members. Most of the tribe lives in Supai, a picturesque…
You know, my co-pilot Jett wasn’t always the L-word Jessica Alba. Before she became the lipsticker queen of Phoenix nightlife, she was just another cute chick in a Catholic schoolgirl uniform hanging out at Scottsdale’s Jamaican Blue Lounge, which celebrates its 10th anniversary this year. “Hey, Special K,” the Jettster…
Ring the Changes What’s hot and what’s not: I’ve noted a lot of positive changes in New Times over the past year. It seems that you’re returning to your former place as the paper to read to find out what’s really going on in Arizona. Michael Lacey has always been…
New Times was honored for everything from religion writing to music criticism — with John Dougherty capturing the Don Bolles Award for investigative reporting — at the Arizona Press Club’s 80th-anniversary banquet in Phoenix. In all, New Times took home eight first-place trophies, including Robert Nelson’s win in the John…
The Metrocenter security guard slows down his white Honda CRV to eye what looks like an episode of MTV’s twisted stunt show Viva La Bam going on in the mall’s east parking lot. One after another, along a ramped walkway, 19-year-old Matt Stewart and his three new friends grab a…
The nation’s biggest garbage company is everywhere in Mobile, one of Maricopa County’s smallest communities. “Thank You Waste Management,” reads a sign in front of the school, just above a message noting that the sign itself was paid for by Waste Management. Headquartered 1,200 miles away in Houston, Waste Management…
Maricopa County Administrator David Smith was named best county leader in the nation by Governing Magazine in November 2001. Now Smith deserves to lose his job. The publication, which is read by practically every high-level bureaucrat in the nation, had gushed that Smith performed miracles in leading Maricopa County out…
After blowing most of our dolo at that swank strip club Skin last week, Jett and I needed a low-rent joint at which to chillax (that’s chill and relax, yo). Fortunately, my pally Gatsby, ribald renaissance man and massage therapist to club hotties, had a semi-genius idea for us. “Monday…
Firearms Aren’t Us Gamers don’t pose a threat: I just wanted to comment on the excellent job that Jimmy Magahern did in delving into our little circle of gaming and other activities (“War Games,” May 6), but I would like to refute the spin that the story seemed to take…
The argument is simple enough: Metro Phoenix is the world’s new baseball mecca. If you love baseball, this is the best place on Earth to visit. If you’re a kid with dreams of being a big league star, this is the best place on Earth to call home. Supporting such…
Governor Janet Napolitano has finally found her man. Tucked under the right arm of presumed Democratic presidential nominee John F. Kerry, Napolitano beamed radiantly during a Democratic party rah-rah at the Arizona Biltmore recently. Normally aloof, Napolitano never drifted far from the Massachusetts senator’s side. She got the good lovin’…
My dawg Jett, a.k.a. the lezzy Nelly, has been ailin’ of late ’cause she got dumped by her squeeze of the week, some fine hoochie-mama with bodacious ta-tas. The girl went Unabomber on me, and locked herself in her room with some bud and a bottle of Tanqueray. “What you…
Fly the Friendly Skies Not for party animals only: Skydive Arizona is not the party animal place you make it out to be (“In the Zone,” Susy Buchanan, April 22). It is the home of world champions — first and foremost. Arizona Airspeed has dominated U.S. Nationals and the world…
They line up by the warehouse door at Contractor Wire and Cable in south Phoenix like an army of IT guys delivering refurbished computers: 140 mostly white males, most in their mid-20s, clutching big CRT monitors in front of their guts and toting hefty cabinets and bags full of wires,…
One day isn’t enough. Phoenix should be celebrating Cuatro y Cinco de Mayo. A two-day party would allow us to fete not only the Mexican Army’s smashing defeat of the French Foreign Legion on May 5, 1862, but also the founding of Phoenix on May 4, 1868. Next year, if…
