HE’S A LOVER, NOT A BITER

Attorney Richard Gierloff admits he’s had some dogs for cases during his legal career. But until a black, male chow named Gunner trotted into his life, Gierloff had never defended an actual canine in a court of law. The tale of Gunner’s recent reprieve from a date with a Maricopa…

BARKLEY’S UNDERBELLY

Charles Barkley strolled underneath the stands to the Phoenix Suns’ dressing room. Barkley appeared nervous. He was ill at ease. Like a rookie before his first big game, he seemed tentative. A sportswriter from a daily newspaper who covers Barkley regularly attempted to make small talk. He spoke innocently. But…

NEWT-ONIAN VALUES

Congressman Newt Gingrich is one of those staunch Republican figures who has the courage to stand up for family values. In a cynical age, we are often too willing to snicker at such men. We do so at our own peril. They are the backbone of the Republican party, which…

BUYING A GILA MONSTER

Just a couple of miles north of Interstate 8, where the freeway cuts through some of southwest Arizona’s harshest desert, lies a narrow ribbon of riverfront property that is one of the most productive farming areas in the world. A relatively few farmers there–perhaps 125–like to brag that they can…

JOINED AT THE HEMP

“Hempy Halloween,” proclaims the sticker plastered on the door of a conference room at the Hermosa Inn. Above the slogan is the image of a jaunty jack-o’-lantern with a joint dangling from its mouth. Elsewhere, a couple of children whose parents are attending the convention skateboard around the sidewalks of…

A TREE-RING CIRCUS

“I think that I shall never see/A tort lovely as a tree.” Or something like that. Bill and Sherri McDowell of Scottsdale probably wouldn’t find humor in that variation on the famous Joyce Kilmer line. After all, their lawyer has told a judge that the McDowells are suffering “irreparable harm”…

A MOJOR LEAGUE VETERAN

He’s been around. The veteran baseball writer has covered every World Series and every All-Star game since 1958. He is so highly regarded by his peers that he has already been inducted into the baseball-writers’ wing of the Hall of Fame at Cooperstown. No one now covering baseball has such…

A THREAT TO THE RULE OF LAW: PEACE

Attorney Steve Doncaster, an ardent cyclist, was pedaling home from work the other day. He was heading west on Washington Street from his office at Salt River Project when a car pulled out of a side street, crashing into Doncaster and his bike head-on. The driver fled. A Good Samaritan…

ON GOLDEN PAWN

You might not be surprised to learn that Alex Gonzalez is an unhappy camper, considering he has spent much of the last four years in pawnshops. For the Arizona Pawnshop Association and its public-image-improvement efforts, the problem is that you might not be surprised; for Gonzalez, who has been fingerprinted…

LAWYERS, GUNS AND PUBLICITY

David Wilbur Studli’s voice sounds disconnected and hollow, like he’s calling up from the bottom of a well. He speaks in short, nervous bursts of words that come quickly but still sound flat and murmurous. He is talking on a speaker phone from a room somewhere inside an Arizona state…

POLS TO THE WASS

Everyone’s a Critic “I made some stupid mistakes,” Eddie Basha says matter-of-factly. Once again, “chubby grocer” is his full-time occupation. During a ten-minute phone interview Monday from Bashas’ Inc. headquarters, the vanquished Democratic gubernatorial nominee employs some brutal adjectives to summarize his performance against Fife Symington–like ignorant, unsophisticated and naive…

THE FREALITY OF THE “RIOT”

The police reports describing the South Mountain High School riot are written in the idiom of men apparently striving to emulate the literary style of a veteran sergeant. All drama is drained. The tone is monotonous. The repetition of phrases fogs the reader’s mind. But after you’ve read enough police…

A PROCESS IS DUE AT SOUTH MOUNTAIN HIGH

When Roberto Frietz, now 39, was a student at South Mountain High School in the 1970s, a riot brought on by racial tensions broke out at the school. “I had no charges brought against me, because I wasn’t a participant,” Frietz recalls. “But I still remember what it was like…

WHO KILLED BOB CRANE? WHO CARES?

There was a time when Bob Crane was even more famous than O.J. Simpson. But that was years ago, and our memories are short. Crane’s every movement was noted with a sort of breathless wonder by gossip columnists across the country. If Crane was seen in the company of a…

A NEW CHAPTER IN THE ESPLANADE SAGA

Last spring, the state’s largest daily newspaper launched an expensive legal challenge to force the federal Resolution Trust Corporation to unseal hundreds of pages of documents filed in its $217 million lawsuit against Governor J. Fife Symington III and other officials of the failed Southwest Savings and Loan. Over the…

DEVOUT OR DERANGED?

You may know that Tiny Tim was one of the most aberrant things to emerge from the Sixties. You may know that two and a half decades ago, he took his long hair, ukulele and piercing falsetto to international prominence, that he married a 17-year-old named Miss Vicky on The…

COP AN ATTITUDE IS COP SHOOT COP AS ANGRY AS YOU THINK?

First things first about Cop Shoot Cop. The band’s name is not some sort of white-boy take on Ice-T anger. And it’s not a pithy stage direction from an old Keystone Kops flick. At least not according to Tod A., Cop Shoot Cop’s lead howler. “We used to have a…

VOUCHING FOR ALSTON

I rang the doorbell at Senator Alston’s house in the 4100 block of West Cheery Lynn Road the other day, and was greeted by the tumultuous sounds of three dogs, two of them quite small but all yapping away at a great rate. Promptly, the door was opened by one…

INSURANCE COMPANIES WANT TO WRONG OUR RIGHTS

After a certain age, you don’t get weepy over country-music laments or wonder at the integrity of politicians. But even if you’ve got the digestive system of a boa constrictor, it is difficult to swallow the level of distortion, the high-finance perversion of facts and the bald-faced lying that is…

SLEEPLESS IN PHOENIX

It’s 3 a.m. What were only minor problems in the daylight are nightmares in the dark. Who can sleep with thoughts closing in like tarantulas stepping across my pillow? What if as a child I’d been adopted by Mia Farrow? Or, even worse, what if Carl Kunasek is elected to…