Audio By Carbonatix
At the end of the week, we bring you a roundup of visitors to the desert’s own Fourth Avenue Jail. To be considered for our Maricopa County mugshots of the week, get arrested, strike a pose, and we’ll take care of the rest.
This week, our alleged offenders are all dressed to impress, perhaps with blue hair, a surgical mask, face tattoos, or a head full of what appears to be fried onions. Enjoy.
10.)
Charges: Assault, unlawful imprisonment, disorderly conduct
We’ll keep an open mind and say this could be a doctor arrested in the middle of brain surgery, or, or, it could be that this guy can’t stop spitting on cops.
9.)
Charges: Criminal trespassing, disorderly conduct
Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calendar?
They each got six months.
8.)
Charges: Failure to appear, criminal damage, assault
Tom Brady looks different.
7.)
Charges: Criminal damage, failure to appear
This lady doesn’t like pink, she is pink. Like, to the point that she’s probably eating that stuff they feed salmon.
6.)
Charges: False reporting to law enforcement, driving on a suspended license
Well, now isn’t that something.
5.)
Charges: Marijuana possession, possession of drug paraphernalia
Dreadlocks on some pot-smokin’ hippie? Nope. French’s fried onions.
Also, possibly earthworms.
4.)
Charges: Dangerous-drug possession, possession of drug paraphernalia
That time when Morticia Addams was a rebellious young lady, did some drugs, and ran off with a motorcycle gang.
3.)
Charges: Marijuana possession, possession of drug paraphernalia
Wow, what a coincidence. Us too!
2.)
Charges: Probation violation
Unfortunately, what appears to be a grade-A awesome cat T-shirt is cropped out of this one.
1.)
Charges: Probation violation
“Hey there pretty la . . . Oh God.”
*Runs straight into traffic.*
*Dies*
BONUS)
Charges: Possession of drug paraphernalia
This guy’s been in the weekly mugshots so much that we can’t just not include him.
