Audio By Carbonatix
At the end of the week, we bring you a roundup of visitors to the desert’s own Fourth Avenue Jail. To be considered for our Maricopa County mugshots of the week, get arrested, strike a pose, and we’ll take care of the rest.
This week, almost all of our offenders are candidates for the worst tattoos in town. A few others, we just couldn’t ignore. Enjoy.
13.)
Charges: Probation violation
What does all that say? It doesn’t even matter how cool, thought-provoking, or badass it is, because you just look like a cat. Also, why is there an eagle in prison on your neck?
12.)
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Charges: Possession of a weapon by a prohibited person
Here’s a guy who also kind of looks like a cat. Or something. Huh.
11.)
Charges: Dangerous-drug possession, possession of drug paraphernalia, shoplifting, probation violation
Wow, I bet guys are getting into bar-fights all the time for this one. Those music notes look real professional. Just kidding, they look horrible.
10.)
Charges: Failure to pay a fine
Looks like someone messed up. Note that gray is not darker than black, which seems to be news to this fellow.
9.)
Charges: Criminal trespassing
Is that a coat rack?
8.)
Charges: Transportation theft, burglary, possession of drug paraphernalia, disorderly conduct
Excuse me, sir, the Satanic bacon on your forehead is scaring the children.
7.)
Charges: Probation violation
I bet the “bitches” love that one.
6.)
Charges: Aggravated assault, kidnapping, burglary, armed robbery
There’s a ton of free advertising no company would ever want. Spoiler alert: We’ll bet you a dollar it’s not exactly a Ferrari under that hood. (More like a Daewoo, if we’re comparing the quality of the brain to the quality of automobile brands.)
5.)
Charges: Failure to appear
Uh, a dollar sign with feet?
4.)
Charges: Threatening
Looks like we’re at the end of the tattoos. Now shit or get off the pot, old man.
3.)
Charges: Burglary, aggravated assault, possession of a weapon by a prohibited person
The villain from the James Bond knock-off movie, The Man With The Golden Forehead.
2.)
Charges: Shoplifting
Hey, maybe he was born with it.
OR MAYBE IT’S MAYBELLINE.
1.)
Charges: Shoplifting
That Pippi Longstocking sequel that’s more of a cautionary tale, where Pippi gets mixed up with the wrong crowd and goes down a bad path in life.
